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Holy Cow

by Primus V

 

“Your wooden arm you hold outstretched to shake with passers-by”

 

UPDATE

See “Cow in the Yard

Tradition holds,” says Harvey Cox, “that the Hollis professor of divinity shall have the privilege of grazing his cow in Harvard Yard”—and as the most recent holder of said professorship, he intends to assert his pasturage right, before witnesses. At 4:30 p.m. on September 10, wearing his academic regalia, he will lead into the Yard, according to early press releases, either a Scottish Highland long-haired cow, with fetching bangs, or a Jersey, with soulful eyes. The Reverend Peter J. Gomes, Pusey minister in the Memorial Church, will offer an invocation to assembled faculty members, students, friends, Cox, and cow. Then the company will process with spirited music to the campus of the Divinity School, tying together the venues in which Cox has taught since he joined the faculty in 1965. After brief tributes, including a Latin oration, the party will adjourn to the school’s Rockefeller Hall for “generous” refreshments and an evening of music by Soft Touch, the 17-piece big band in which the Hollis professor plays lead tenor saxophone. Just incidentally, the occasion will mark the publication by HarperCollins of Cox’s latest book, The Future of Faith.

A search in Harvard Archives uncovers no chapter and verse proving that grazing rights were ever formally attached to the Hollis professorship, established in 1740. Of course, the Harvard Corporation may have let in some Hollis cow in the distant past on the quiet, just as parking spots are bestowed today.

One may wonder whether a divine’s bovine would have wanted to munch the Yard of yesteryear. Professor Samuel Eliot Morison wrote in Three Centuries of Harvard that President John Kirkland in 1810 “found the interior of the Yard an ‘unkempt sheep-commons,’ almost treeless, provided with no regular paths, and cluttered up with a brewhouse, the college woodyard, and sundry privies.…A neighboring nuisance was the college pig-pen, where the Corporation’s own porkers fought with rats for the commons garbage; for years the hideous clamor of a pig-killing was wont to disturb recitations in University [Hall].”

The grazing right “is a tradition,” says Cox, “and at Harvard we never use the words ‘only’ or ‘merely’ to modify ‘tradition.’” It is “a delightful conceit,” Gomes says, but quickly adds, “It might be true.” In their multivolume Harvard University History of Named Chairs, William Bentinck-Smith and Elizabeth Stouffer call the far-more-often-cited alleged right of the Boylston professor of rhetoric and oratory to keep a cow in the Yard “a pleasant legend which has come down through the years.” 

Such legends may be immortal. When poet Robert Fitzgerald became the Boylston professor in 1965, former students of his at another institution, reading in misinformed press accounts of his quaint prerogatives, sent him a cow. He had to arrange for its removal to the country.

More Articles by Primus V

November-December 2009

Curious Colors

July-August 2009

No. Not Yet. Never.

May-June 2009

Song for Hard Times

March-April 2009

Drat Those Vandals!

January-February 2009

FDR's Digs

Responses to “Holy Cow

  1. August 25, 2009

    I find the Harvard tradition that “the Hollis professor of divinity shall have the privilege of grazing his cow in Harvard Yard” to be unique.

    The fact that Prof. Harvey Cox intends to assert his pasturage right on September 10, 2009 by leading a cow into Harvard Yard should be quite a sight.

    The activities that follow the cow’s entry into Harvard Yard — concluding with refreshments and music at Rockefeller Hall — will be an experience that Harvard faculty, staff, students, and other attendants of this unusual ritual will probably remember for a lifetime.

    Indeed, those who attend this ceremony should find it a “moo-ving experience!”

    ~George Patsourakos

  2. August 26, 2009

    Thus, no doubt, the expression, “Holy Cow!”

    ~Lawrence P. Haddock, '67

  3. August 26, 2009

    My apologies to Primus. I didn’t realize he had beaten me to this terrible joke when he entitled the article!

    ~Lawrence P. Haddock, '67

  4. August 27, 2009

    Add a few more cows and savings in the dairy budget might even allow Harvard to furnish house dining halls with a hot breakfast again… if HUDS isn’t too busy providing “generous” refreshments to jazz band receptions.

    ~Miranda Richmond Mouillot, '03

  5. August 30, 2009

    I remember Cox, my former Academic Advisor, with much gratitude and imagination.

    ~Leo Rodriguez, 94

  6. September 11, 2009

    Daughter Katie ’10, noted that the college choir interrupted their tea time to enjoy today’s spectacle, thankful for the whimsy.

    ~Robert M. Schick, '77

  7. September 15, 2009

    Wonderful!

    Greetings from Cambridge University, where we regularly keep cows on university grounds.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34565761@N02/3213891152/

    ~J. Nathan Matias

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